I fell off the wagon!!

Last year I gave up alcohol. It was the 6th of October and I was sick of using alcohol as a coping mechanism. I had woken up that weekday morning after not quite remembering the night before, the children had school and I now had the torcher of the morning school run (on foot).

Once again the night before had started as a few drinks with a friend and had turned into more than a few drinks. I’d slept rubbish all night and woken up with the impending fear of what I had done/said/posted on Facebook – the “beer fear” as I like to call it.

So, that morning, I decided that enough was enough and that I needed to get control of my alcohol consumption.

Let me add a bit of context here, I wouldn’t label myself as an alcoholic. I wasn’t drinking every day (but almost) and I could be around alcohol without the need to drink it. I just “liked a drink” but at the back of my mind was always the thought of “when does my party overlap someone else’s problem”.

That is how I found myself ditching the drink. 

Within days I felt all sorts of benefits, I slept like a baby. I woke up feeling fresh. I no longer had the 3 pm lull where I needed a nap or a hair of the dog (another drink for those unsure of that term).

But the biggest benefit was how much my mood improved. I suffer from an anxiety disorder and take medication for it, a medication that shouldn’t really be taken with alcohol. But we all ignore that right?

Because my mornings were started with me feeling fresher and more alert I found myself more productive, that improved the rest of my day because I wasn’t playing catch up all day, I felt more in control of my life and felt that I could point it in the direction I wanted it to go rather than one in which the alcohol decided.

I managed 7 months of sobriety, but this weekend I fell off the wagon! The sun, bank holiday vibes and telling myself that I could just have a couple lured me into a false sense of security and I found myself with a drink in my hand on Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday!!

This is probably the point in which you are wondering why I’m telling you this right? Well, do you notice how I have never said that I have failed? Do you notice that not once have I used the tone of “I’ve undone all my hard work”?

Yes, I broke my sober streak but all the good I have done before this weekend is still there. I still had 7 months of hangover-free days. I still woke up for 7 months without the beer fear. Yes, I made a tit of myself and paid for it with a 2-day hangover but, it’s all a step on my path to self-discovery and has given me back the momentum of living life alcohol-free!

If anything in this post resonated with you then please do get in touch. I can help you with some free resources or we can jump on a call for a cuppa. If you are looking for 1:1 support to help you through this or any other life change then I can help you with that too!

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